it’s around noon here and i just woke up about a half an hour ago. still trying to recollect the details from last night.

there’s this guy named Jordan. he’s my age. really attractive, kinda serious, pretty funny. i feel like we get along great. he told me that i made him nervous. which i kind of brushed off as a joke (like i do with everything. note to self: take other people more seriously some times). 

we had hung out once a couple of weeks ago. we just smoked a blunt and then we made out. the make out session was alright, i was starting to get fired up when i realized that i was still on my period. so as soon as we got into a grinding position, i suggested his leave.

the following two weeks were kind of weird. he would hit me up and then i would flake. and vice versa. yesterday it just so happens that he called me, after not texting for a couple of days, asking me if i wanted to see him last night. i would have been lying if i said no. bonus points for him for calling me and not texting. 

it worked out perfectly because yesterday was the first day of my work weekend. his phone call got my butt motivated and to the gym. but during my workout he called and said he would be heading over an hour and a half early! i told him to just wait :/ 

when 10 finally rolled around, he showed up. looking hot as fuck. we went to my room and we kept making out on and off while he rolled 2 blunts. we smoked one and started hooking up.

not sure why but i was just not feeling like super duper horny… like i felt amazing but i just couldn’t stay wet! his dick is AMAZING. it’s nice and big and juicy. but as soon as we stuck it in (condom on, of course), i would just dry up like the sahara :(

this ended up being really frustrating to me. so i told him that i didn’t really feel like having sex. he said, “ok” with kind of a fake smile and we cuddled. 

he pulled me into his chest, wrapped his arms around me, and he asked me what was wrong.

i told him that i had no idea. i just wasn’t in the mood.. you know how girls sometimes get like that? 

he said he was sad because i had told him i wanted to hook up with him but i really didn’t.

i told him that i thought i that was what i wanted but in the heat of the moment, turns out it wasn’t.

he didn’t know how to feel about that.

i told him that i’m not the type of girl to just throw myself around during sex, i actually want to like the guy i’m hooking up with.

he advised i was thinking way too much about everything (typical guy stuff. but probably spot on). he told me that he thought he was disappointing me, which made me sad but relieved.

we eventually started hooking up again and things ended up nicely ;)

he’s a great cuddler. like omg. he just wants to be snuggled up next to you. and he’s really fucking warm. and he smells good. but jesus christ, does he snore. he’s really loud too. but i eventually grew so tired, i drowned it out.

he ended up staying until about a quarter to 7, which is fine by me. he woke up, sat on his phone for a bit, got dressed, kissed me on my sleepy forehead, and walked himself out.

i woke up this morning about 4 and a half hours later, sore from my work out yesterday, and happy from finally having been laid in a month!

i do have a hickey/bite mark on my left collarbone. i have noticed that’s a popular place for guys to leave their marks…. 

anywho. joshua is in rehab for opiate painkillers (who knew?). colton (the dude who’s motorcycle i rode on) is super flakey, unfortunately, and he’s leaving for the navy in a month :(

oh, before i forget. Jordan has a 4 yr old daughter.


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